It’s Okay to be ‘Soft’

I hear it a lot.

“You’re so soft.”

And maybe they’re right, maybe I am ‘soft’. But I’m okay with that because I’m human. I have emotions. Hell, we all have emotions. Do I choose to be open about mine? Yeah, I do. I learned a long time ago that holding in your emotions to protect your image is useless. What is the point in appearing happy on the outside if you’re miserable on the inside?

We have to take steps to better understand ourselves and increase our emotional awareness. Emotional awareness helps us build relationships. When we are who we are with someone, they learn to love the real you. We all want to be loved for who we are, so we have to be honest with ourselves first about who we are.

When we can openly and honestly communicate our emotions, we can live a happier life. Sometimes you need to scream into the sky out of frustration or lean against the wall of your shower and cry. It’s okay to do that. It’s okay to have emotions. The relief that you feel after you scream or after you cry outweighs whatever social stigma may be plaguing your mind.

In fact, studies have shown that crying is actually good for you for a variety of reasons. Besides actually making you feel better by giving you a release for your pent up emotions, it can help to detoxify your body. When you cry your body releases stress related hormones and other toxins that flushes out your system.

Researchers have actually found that when you cry, your body activates the parasympathetic nervous system to help your body relax and you begin to soothe your pain. In addition to that, crying releases endorphins to the brain which helps to soothe physical pain, even numbing you in some cases.

If you choose to belittle someone because of their emotions, then maybe you need to open up your emotions. Learn to trust and understand yourself, get in tune with your emotions. We can’t hold everything in. Sometimes we have to express how we are feeling.


Published by Tyler Wittkofsky

Tyler Wittkofsky is a multi-genre author, blogger, award-winning marketing and communications professional, and fierce mental health advocate from the southern coast of North Carolina. Tyler has been writing short stories for as long as he can remember. Growing up the grandson of an English teacher, Tyler had a constant fuel to his creative fire in his grandmother. He started writing poetry in 2012 to cope with his mental health struggles with anxiety, bipolar, and depression. Using poetry as an escape, he developed a unique style of poetry that has left readers saying, “Tyler’s voice is compassionate, even while suffering, and I felt the despair and loneliness seeping out through his words.” His first poetry collection, composed of poems written from 2012 to 2016, was published in March 2020. He began his first novel in 2019. The novel, (Not) Alone, was a story based on true events surrounding the struggles of living with mental illness. Described by readers as “An Intimate Closure with Mental Illness,” this began Tyler’s revitalized passion for mental health. He decided that his writing would have a focus on mental health. His next novel, The Seeds of Love: Sunflower Kisses Book One, was his debut romance novel and debut series. Described as “a great job of relaying the realistic emotions of young love and emotional drama that is particularly difficult for young adults…”, his debut romance novel was met with much success. In 2021, Tyler began writing short stories. He was accepted into several anthologies in mid-2021, expected for publication in early 2022. He also writes supernatural horror and historical fantasy for the online magazines In the Pantheon and In the Crescent. He has work published through Five Minute Affairs as well. He built his website in 2021. On this site, he started his blogging journey. He began writing book reviews, interviewing indie authors, and writing on mental health. This passion sparked a new desire to connect with more people. Tyler is currently in the beginning stages of two podcasts that he hopes to be live by the end of 2021. Tyler currently lives in Leland, North Carolina with his wife, Grace, and dogs, Dutch and Belle. You can find him and his works here:

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